Ramadhan Diary

Day 1 of Ramadhan (1st of August 2011)

I broke my fast at Unisim. First time ever, I broke my fast with strangers instead of family members. Well, hello new friends. New friends were made because of Ramadhan. Ramadhan is the only time total strangers can be related to each other in one way or another.

I taught him and he wished me " Happy Ramadhan!" ^^

Day 2 of Ramadhan (2nd of August 2011)

Again, broke fast with another set of new strangers. World is strange after all. And subhanallah I discovered I was praying in the right direction after all without even finding the kiblat with a compass. How amazing and blessed I felt. Amin~

And he said " Ramadhan day is very hard TT" it made me laugh as I thought ' As if you're fasting!' But in my heart i prayed insyaallah one day when Allah gives you hidayah you will.

Day 3 of Ramadhan ( 3rd of August 2011)

Finally broke my fast with my FAMILY. The mum cooked mee soto. yummy~ Though the air was a bit tensed. Alhamdulillah I get to be with my family today. Today was challenging, my night classes are taking its toll on me. With the fasting, teaching and night classes I feel terribly exhausted. Thank you Allah for giving me strength today. Allahuakbar.

Lies

Missing Korea---

Life has been hectic. The only reason I'm still working at that hell hole is my children. All my lovely children that I educate. I love them to pieces. Love them soooo much. Even if she doesn't like me I don't care because I am loved by many more.

This is the time where I feel like booking a flight, fly off and never come back.

What do I miss about Korea? People, place and food.

This picture of Namsan is beautiful. I remember taking this on the way up to the tower.

It is like a dream, what more with the cold weather and snow. Winter sonata all the way~

Next June please come fast~

Korean Study Lesson 1 - Introduction ( 소개합니다 )

저는 아티카고 22살 (입니다/ 이에요).

싱가폴에 살아요.

저는 수학하고 미술 선생님 (입니다/ 이에요).

저의 취미는 노래 부르기하고 춤 (입니다 / 이에요)

---입니다 = to be (is, are, was, were)

--- 이에요 (last consonant)= to be (is,are,was,were)

---예요 ( vowel ) = (is,are,was,were)

어휘 2

직업 ( occupation )

선생님 - Teacher

사무실 / 회사완 - office worker

여행사 직원 - Travel agent

주부- homemaker

의사- Doctor

간호사 - Nurse

비행기 조종사 - Pilot

My Korean Vocabulary List 1 People( 사람 )

This will help me in my quest of learning the language.

Boy - 소녀
Girl - 소년
Woman - 여자
Man -남자
Mother - 어머니
Father -아버지
Grandmother - 할머니
Grandfather - 할아버지
Aunt - 아주마 / 이모 / 숙모/ 아주머니
Uncle - 아저씨 /숙부
Younger Sister - 여동생
Younger Brother -남동생
Older sister - 언니 / 누나
Older brother -오빠/ 형
Eldest daughter or son - 장녀/ 장남
Niece / nephew - 조카
Cousin - 사촌 / 종형제

The beginning of a traveller. 나는 여행자입니다!!!

It's been 1 year 3 months and 2 weeks since I last updated. That is if I've calculated correctly.

Many things have changed. Life has changed. Work has changed and so have I.

The last post is about being happy at work. Hmm... now? Don't even want to think about it.

Everything has its ups and downs. Life works that way I guess.

I just thought I want to use this blog as a record of my memory of places I've been to. Recently I've been traveling around. This is something new that I never had the chance to do in the past due to circumstances. It is something I've grown to love. I've been blessed. Thank you Allah~

This blog will work as a passport to my memories as a traveller.

I've been to 2 countries in the year 2010:

Malaysia & South Korea.

You may think it's not a big deal but these 2 different places holds many fond memories and interesting discoveries.

So this entry will begin with a sneak peak of my holidays to Kuala Lumpur, Melacca City & Seoul.

Looks fun? I'll compile it as a video for both Syaz and I to look back on.

Melacca City with the kids

Seoul, Korea made 2010 the year I experienced snow and love Korea more.

From now on, this blog will be randomly updated. 2011.23.

Hopefully this year and age will bring me more happiness insyaallah.

FED UP

Dear Allah,

This is an open letter to you. Please ya Allah please help me. Please let that man just listen for once. I feel so trapped with the way he treats me ya Allah. His words only hurts me the whole time. He said that I've hurt him? I am tired... I am tired of being blame. And I only can blame myself for being a horrible person because I truly am. I am not perfect. I am rude. I know I am not suppose to fight back but I just can't stand it any longer. But from now I promise to keep my mouth shut. Ya Allah please protect me, please forgive me. All these things that are going on here is hurting me sooo much please ya allah make my faith stronger. The devils around me I can feel them they are sooo clear in wanting to steer me away & further away from you. I am still holding on to you & please don't let go cause I will do all I can and never let go. Because the only thing I want in the end is to meet u, Allah. Please ya Allah this journey is long and arduous, full of obstacles please let me come out victorious when you take me to be with you . Jadikanlah aku hamba yang ikhlas & bertaqwa. amin.

PS: Change of subject engagement is going to be my next topic ;) Leave a message & cheer me up :)

Tough Times

Been going through tough times lately. All I can do is pray to Allah & to be strong and persevere. The only place i will pour my heart out is here & during my duties to Allah. So bear with me, I won't tell you exactly & why. But there is this very stubborn man that I just can't seem to cooperate with. Yes I am rebellious.

Been doing lots of thinking lately, whether I wanna continue this career path or venture into a new area or place. I was thinking of giving this job 6 years, 6 years feels long by the end of it I will be 26? By then I think I should have a few things in hand like a degree? But in what? I am contemplating a lot.

I've been thinking maybe to venture off to another country to work by the end of 6 years insyaallah if this plan works well I'll pick a new place to call home. I will be stepping out of Singapore to look for interesting places by end of this year i hope. Lots of things to do, to think let's put marriage aside that is too complicated to put in the picture now cause I have no one to share my life to begin with. But bottomline is I want to if possible marry someone of another nationality (LOL) ask me why I'll answer. I'll leave that at that.

Meanwhile, I've been learning another language to occupy my spare time ahahaha which I don't have much of these days since school started anyways thought I'd share my Raya 2009 photos with the readers(if there is any to begin with)

Saranghae. you've got to love life for its ups & downs. Hopefully we will all end our life on a happy note that will play through the after life.

Ya Allah

Ya allah ampunkanlah aku. Pemikiran ku amat kusut. Ampunilah aku kerana terfikir yg buruk tentang mu ampunilah ku ya allah. Aku rasa peperanganku dengan syaitan tidak akan pernah berakhir sampai aku tutup mata. Jikalau aku terbuat dosa secara sengaja atau tidak. Dibawah pengaruh syaitan atau tidak ampunilah aku ya allah

Misses & Fears

I fear what is gonna happen after my 3 years contract. What am I gonna do with life? I want my life to reach of a higher level in happiness and I don't want me to have a boring no life kinda deal... I want to hmmm... travel and sigh. I really don't know what to do yet.

In short, I miss my friends a lot.

Why?

Just tell me what's wrong can? Don't make me feel guilty. 

Inspired By...

Ever since someone asked me to design their wedding dress. I've been designing like crazy its like my passion for designing has been rekindled. So i decided to upload my first 5 pieces of design just to get people's opinions and reactions. Their feedback is amazing and I've been thinking, from now on I'm gonna take my apparel designing seriously. I will take it a step further once I have gotten my sewing skill. I'll start a small online business selling my designs.

I borrowed a book the other day which is ' fashion illustration by fashion designers' and gosh I am SOOOO inspired by the illustrations of well known designers such badgley mischka, ricardo tiscci the man who designed givenchy, isaac mizrahi, michael vollbracht, peter som and the best i've seen and love are illustrations from Costello tagliapietra.





There are some more coming up I will keep u posted :)

Workaholic

Sushi smiles again.

Hello everyone, yes back to blogging.
I am so thankful for all the wonderful things in my life right now. Alhamdulillah, its like whatever I have fought so hard for is finally coming round to me. I am getting better. I can't thank Allah enough. I hope I won't forget HIM after all the great things HE has granted me & be much more rajin to mengerjakan ibadah or amal kebaikan.

Ever since I started work. I am dreading weekends. I look forward to go to school every single day. I love executing my lesson plans, love hanging out with my hot, hip & cool colleagues. LOL. But one thing that always put a smile on my face every single day is the fact that I have photos of my favourite girls on my desk. I have yet to take a photo of my barely decorated desk but I do have photo of my once empty desk :) I have to put more stuff in.

I don't want to move in and settle too much because I'll be off in a month plus or so. I can start settling in next year cause i'll be there for 3 years, hopefully I do well and comeback for more. Insyaallah. I feel that I have the desire to see my students succeed or destined for great things.

One thing I hate though, I hate scolding them for they don't do my homework. There is this one particular boy whom I know personally, I know he is rude but when I scold him, I feel like crying. It makes me feel like I am a horrible person :( I hate scolding I want them to have fun in my class and love going to school. Only if they are MORE enthusiastic to do exercises. I have to plan more educational games. Everytime I remember this boy I really do feel like crying because I know his situation but I can't help him if he doesn't want to help himself. Allah please guide me so I can help him. Here are pics of my pencil holder , once empty desk & the painting i did for my first week of Art course( IT IS UGLY can't blame me though I was rushing to go off)

My once empty desk now filled with a mini HP laptop to help me keep in touch with my outside world ahaha.

My once empty rack, now filled with books

My cute cat stationary holder that is now on the table filled with colourful pens

My painting on a canvas I was too ashamed to put it on my desk because this is not the best and I can do better than this.
Some outings in the past weeks :

With Sakinah

With Tim the clownsellor

With Syazzy Dearest

With Sakinah again ( My sushi buddy) we went to Shintokyo to stop our cravings for sushi.
PS: I made Roti John Jr. today. Will post the pic tomorrow.

Q & A

I had a little Q& A session with the kids whom I ajar mengaji. At first we mingle about wrestling then...it leads to me telling them I'm on a diet. Then the youngest there asked me : Kakak kenapa nak diet? Kakak kan in perfect shape? LOL I laughed a lot at this which is kinda cute, hilarious.

Other Questions they asked me:

Q: How old are you?
A: 21

Q: You have a boyfriend?
A: Never

Q: When are you going to have one?
A: I don't know!

Upon seeing Jin Hao's photo on my phone :
Q: Is that your boyfriend?
A: No, he is my good friend

Q: Why isn't he your boyfriend?
A: Because the world is gonna turn upside down if he becomes my boyfriend

Where do I begin?

Seriously where do I start, I think work has crept up on me & time is moving too fast that I feel like it should stop OR I should stop and take a breather.

I've gotten my own desk/cubicle, I don't get all the hype of decorating my desk. I will do it...eventually. I want to sit & talk to someone or anyone to let my thoughts out but no one seem willing to do so OR I have bottled my feelings too much that I don't know how to get it out. I feel like I'm stuck in a shell & I don't know how to get out. Maybe I am too guarded & I have built these walls around me to protect myself, man I'm starting to type bs already. Ya Allah please guide me. I am looking forward if anyone can reach out & touch me (metaphorically speaking).

Psych

I love to think that I got psychic powers. I don't know is it me or what, I know people too well, especially those who are close to me. Even on MSN i know when they are upset, happy without them telling me. What is that called? Telepathy? LOL I don't know.

Anyways side track me & Sakinah have planned!!! We are going to KL via Train back & forth next summer! What am I talking about? Singapore have only Summer! But I probably thinking of making it faster, end of this year maybe. I can't wait. toodles ~

I Hate It When...

• Someone's being plain rude
  
• Someone still in love with a person who hurts & treats them bad.
  
• I always doubt myself
  
• Someone who is indecisive
  
• A random guy approaches me & talk casual
  
• And finally, when I feel like I'm far from Allah

Today went out with Sakinah I had fun. Many stuff happens today , the bad, the awkward & the good. But I'm just too tired to tell so let me just put pics of us eating putu piring =)

We were clearly enjoying our Putu Pirings

Fluffy white soft & sugary putu piring

We ate roti john first hers is cheesy mine was the normal one.

Thanks Sakinah kerana melayan kempunan aku.

Ya Allah please bring me closer to you because I will only want to be with you and closer to you. amin.

Take My Tortured Heart By The Hand

Yeah you read that right. My tortured heart. Maybe nobody realised that I am having the worse times in life right now... Only Allah knows. Well maybe my smiles & my laughters are what I can standby and hide behind for now. I don't wanna show the cracks that are appearing. I am a great liar...

If you're smart you can see it***.

Call Me A Freak...

I spent hours cleaning up my wardrobe & room. I swear I was just trying to occupy my time & I was bored. So take a look...

My make up section ahaha look what's hanging I call them my HANG bags. I actually also cleaned up the drawers under it where my clutches & belts are.

Look at this haha the one on the left is humaira's & mine's on the right. Humaira's a little messy but you know just need to arrange the clothes that's all. All of those are hers except for the judo outfit! After all the cleaning I went to watch Dr.Seuss a bit than I watched Ricky Martin shake his stuff which made me fell asleep. Let's call it a day~

The Climb Has Been Reached

Alhamdulillah. Thank u Allah my prayers have been answered. Thank you everyone for their prayers & well wishes. I got the job at Yio Chu Kang Primary School.Well this is where my new journey will begin & a new climb to start on. I am a little nervous about it as it is at my own primary school. I'd have prefer at a school where no one knows me but I am VERY thankful that I got the job at all so it does not matter.

A lot of good things have been happening lately. I got the job, the long awaited picnic which have been planned for years finally happened but its sad to think that she wasn't at the picnic with us. I remembered whenever picnic plans were cancelled she got angry but hey don't look back people say but I miss her a lot. The other day I heard the song emotions on the radio it reminded me of her. :( Well one day we will sure meet again my dear. So on a happier note, photos for everyone.



Me & my bestie

Aisyah the photographer

I know this photo is funny... Now here comes the much teased about photo

laugh all you want!