FED UP

Dear Allah,

This is an open letter to you. Please ya Allah please help me. Please let that man just listen for once. I feel so trapped with the way he treats me ya Allah. His words only hurts me the whole time. He said that I've hurt him? I am tired... I am tired of being blame. And I only can blame myself for being a horrible person because I truly am. I am not perfect. I am rude. I know I am not suppose to fight back but I just can't stand it any longer. But from now I promise to keep my mouth shut. Ya Allah please protect me, please forgive me. All these things that are going on here is hurting me sooo much please ya allah make my faith stronger. The devils around me I can feel them they are sooo clear in wanting to steer me away & further away from you. I am still holding on to you & please don't let go cause I will do all I can and never let go. Because the only thing I want in the end is to meet u, Allah. Please ya Allah this journey is long and arduous, full of obstacles please let me come out victorious when you take me to be with you . Jadikanlah aku hamba yang ikhlas & bertaqwa. amin.

PS: Change of subject engagement is going to be my next topic ;) Leave a message & cheer me up :)

Tough Times

Been going through tough times lately. All I can do is pray to Allah & to be strong and persevere. The only place i will pour my heart out is here & during my duties to Allah. So bear with me, I won't tell you exactly & why. But there is this very stubborn man that I just can't seem to cooperate with. Yes I am rebellious.

Been doing lots of thinking lately, whether I wanna continue this career path or venture into a new area or place. I was thinking of giving this job 6 years, 6 years feels long by the end of it I will be 26? By then I think I should have a few things in hand like a degree? But in what? I am contemplating a lot.

I've been thinking maybe to venture off to another country to work by the end of 6 years insyaallah if this plan works well I'll pick a new place to call home. I will be stepping out of Singapore to look for interesting places by end of this year i hope. Lots of things to do, to think let's put marriage aside that is too complicated to put in the picture now cause I have no one to share my life to begin with. But bottomline is I want to if possible marry someone of another nationality (LOL) ask me why I'll answer. I'll leave that at that.

Meanwhile, I've been learning another language to occupy my spare time ahahaha which I don't have much of these days since school started anyways thought I'd share my Raya 2009 photos with the readers(if there is any to begin with)

Saranghae. you've got to love life for its ups & downs. Hopefully we will all end our life on a happy note that will play through the after life.